10 Lessons Learned During Extended Family Travel

Written by Dave.

It is hard to believe, but it has now been six months since I quit my last physical therapist job in order to hit the open roads on our extended family travel adventures.  What an interesting and life changing experience it has been so far.  It was a difficult and mentally challenging process getting to the point of departure, but it’s all been worth it.  Through all of the challenges and adventures so far, we have learned many lessons by embarking on our extended family travel that would not have been learned had we stayed at home.

1.  It is really hard to leave “Normal Life” behind.

I guess you can chalk this one up to comfort zones.  Even when you have incredible plans, it is really easy to keep putting them off.  There are a million and one excuses.  Lets make just a little more money first.  Europe will still be there next year.  We have so much stuff to pack away, lets give ourselves a bit more time to get it done.  Is it really smart to quit my job?  Will I be able to get another one when I return?  The list of things you tell yourself truly are endless.  And they all seem so reasonable during your self talk.  But the truth is, they are all just excuses putting off your dreams.  You will never find a perfect time, and you can always put one more thing on the list to accomplish before you leave.  Unless you are truly committed and serious, there will always be a reason to wait.  Changes in circumstances rarely happen until you step out of your comfort zone, as challenging as this may be.

“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.”   -Neal Donald Walsch

2.  Sometimes you need a push to get out the door.

My push was quitting my secure physical therapy job working for the Department of Veterans Affairs, and taking a short term travel job in physical therapy.  We put our house on the rental market, and had to leave.  I had to kick myself out of my own house.  We loaded up our van and hit the road.  Remarkably, at the end of my short term travel job, I almost let myself get talked into staying on longer in spite of our plan.  Old habits die hard.  After shaking that crazy notion out of my head, we once again loaded our van and started traveling and touring through California and the southwest.  It was a good warm up for the Big Trip.  This was the commencement of a time in life with no permanent address.  The real adventure began!

 

3.  Make life simpler and easier, have less stuff.

Our family really does not fall into the typical consumer lifestyle.  We don’t chase the latest fads and fashions.  We are pretty careful about what we buy.  That being said, we had been in the same house for about 18 years, and really had accumulated a lot of stuff.  Trying to pare down for travel was painful.  At first we tried selling things on Craig’s List, yard sales, etc., but in the end we gave away more than half of it.  Giving it away to charitable causes was easier, and felt good to do.  Also amazing was the number of truckloads we took to the city dump.  Where did it all come from, and why were we storing it?  The whole time we were trying to eliminate excess stuff, I kept saying I will never let this happen again.  Never will we accumulate so much stuff.  Things I hadn’t seen or used in more than ten years.  What in the world did we have it for?

Now the whole family can see how little we can actually need, and not feel deprived.  All the action in life is outside in nature, with people, and with experiences.  Much better than sheltering with stuff in the house.  Start streamlining now, and life is simpler and more enjoyable.

 

4.  A change in environment quickly leads to new opportunities.

Walking through a store in southern Spain, I saw a guitar and thought why not.  I had always thought it would be fun to learn, and now I had the time.  Little did I know that my daughter, who dislikes practicing musical instruments, would also take an interest and self learn from online tutorials.  Her favorite new hobby is playing finger style guitar.  We also found ourselves taking photos of all the places we went, mainly for memories and sharing with family.  We quickly noticed that we took some really good photos.  Now we are learning more about photography than we had planned.  Wintering in Spain, we spent three hours a day learning Spanish, not something we would have done at home.  The list goes on, but you get the idea.  Learning and pursuing our passions is unbelievably rewarding.

 

5.  Family time expands beyond anything I ever knew before.

At home, there are so many distractions that steal time away from family.  Work fills so much time, and frequently leaves you mentally and physically drained.  Your kids have school, after school activities, and time with friends.  Tasks around the house steal your time.  When the weekend rolls around, you catch up on the bigger to-do items around the house.  When I actually add up the time I was able to spend with my wife and kids, I feel a sense of loss over things I missed out on.

While traveling, we are now together for all of life’s experiences.  This has enabled new connections and understanding within the family that were missing before, and unlikely to occur at home.  This experience creates a tighter family unit, and we are able to be a team instead of a group of individuals who just happen to live under the same roof.  That is what family is all about, but easily gets lost in life’s distractions.

I didn’t realize how incredibly creative my daughter was.  I always knew she had a good imagination, but she can create a game, a story, or an activity out of anything.  Give her some sticks and a rubber band, and she is making a bow and arrow.  She will create a store out of scraps and boxes lying around.  She will spin out a full story as we walk down a trail.  I look at her taking photos, and think what is she doing?  Later, when we load them on the computer, I see a perspective I would have never thought of capturing.

I never knew my son woke up with such animated enthusiasm every morning.  Before, I was always gone before he was up, having already left for work.  I now see throughout the day his undying optimism, and sense of humor.  He tests his grasp of humor throughout each day.  Not much will bring that boy down for more than a few minutes.  We will be walking along, and he will burst into a song with correct tune and words fitting to the current situation.  I now know he notices everything and has a great memory.  I am grateful that his early memories can now include many memories with me.

 

6.  Children blossom while traveling.

Travel is one of the best gifts I could give my children.  Initially, they were not convinced, and at times even opposed to the idea.  Early on in the travels, even as looking out over beautiful vistas, there was still some hesitation about the idea.  As time went on however, realization started to kick in that this was actually pretty cool.  They could learn what they wanted, when they wanted.  Learning actually accelerated with self guided learning.  Once my daughter actually stopped to think about it, she realized she could learn more and get more done in three hours than she could in a full day of school.  And she was having fun again!  She hadn’t even realized how stressful school had become for her until she had been able to distance from it.  She is now writing children’s books, including her own illustrations, playing the guitar, cooking delicious meals, and rediscovering her creativity.  My son has discovered an imagination, and is absorbing conversations about business and life at an amazing pace.  He also was able to go to a Spanish school and learn in Spanish, even though he knew none of the language starting out.  He was intimidated at first, but did very well.  I know that they will be stronger in life because of this experience.  Both of our kids now have the time and ability to discover their true passions, and how they can turn their passions into their life pursuits.  How rewarding it is to watch our children experience, grow, and blossom with creativity and learning.

 

7.  Being in uncomfortable situations are a great driver for personal growth.

I am not an outgoing person.  When going to a large gathering, I am more likely to sit on the edge and watch the interactions than participate in them.  This experience is pushing me outside of my normal comfort zone.  I am now in new countries and new situations without a common language.  This forces the use of creativity in conversation.  This is good for me, as you learn and grow much more in life with interaction with others.  I am not with the same groups of people with the same common beliefs and points of reference.  I now have to regularly push myself outside of my comfort zones, and I am surviving.  Not only surviving, but growing as a person.

On another front, we now have time to work on the various personal health goals we have always had, but never seemed to have the energy to follow through on.  It is fun to come up with new and creative ways to exercise, that requires no equipment.  No health clubs or equipment, and good results.  I am stronger now than I have been since I was in college.  Not that I was in bad shape, but I am able to do more for myself now, and it is really showing.  Without good health, you are in a difficult position.  Money can’t buy health, but now we have the time and ability to focus on it, and it is paying off.

 

8.  Traveling can be good for business.

It is amazing how quickly you start to see new possibilities and opportunities once you break out of your normal routine.  Ideas flow more easily, and you start to see new possibilities.  We discovered possibilities in mobile app creation, writing ideas, product ideas, etc.  We brainstorm as we drive down the road or walk through the countryside, and look for business ideas and opportunities everywhere we go.  We have started writing books, will soon have a photography site on-line, and have some other projects in the works.  The creativity and ideas for independent business are flowing in a way that wasn’t possible while stuck in the daily grind of routine.  I enjoyed physical therapy, but it turns out what I liked most about it was helping people, and we are now discovering ways to help people more efficiently while still making a living doing it.  The amazing thing is that by watching us, our kids are now flowing with ideas on how they too can do the same thing.  This is exciting stuff!  In a time when it is hard to find a good reliable job, why not create your own.  I would rather be in control of my own successes and failures (learning experiences), than be at the mercy of someone else who doesn’t have my best interests in mind.  We are in the information age, where there are now a multitude of possibilities.  We now have the time and ability to focus on new possibilities.

 

9.  The world is not as scary as the news would have you believe.

When you watch the news, the headlines are pretty scary.  It sounds like everywhere outside your country’s borders is less safe than where you currently are.  In reality, things are pretty tame overseas.  We had heard of the riots in Spain due to the financial crisis, and wondered if we should really winter there.  Upon arrival, we didn’t see any problems.  Things are really quite safe.  Actually, Spaniards ask how we could feel safe in America with all of the guns and violence that they are hearing about on the news.  Unfortunately, I have to say I hear much more about violence and unrest in America than I do here in Europe.   Of course there are some places that you really wouldn’t want to go to right now, for example Syria and other hot spots, but in general things are no worse here and often times safer.

 

10.  Travel offers you the ability to reinvent yourself.

The person I was, and the way I lived my life is changing.  It is the same with the rest of the family also.  We are able to become better and more rounded than we were.  We are learning to take time to smell the roses, walk through the forest, and talk to strangers.  These are simple things that get lost in the rush of daily life.  We are learning improved tolerance of differences, how to embrace change, and learn from failures.  We are becoming a tighter family, and leaning to actually have fun and enjoy life.  The exciting thing is, it is still just beginning.  What a wonderful journey.

 

At this point, we don’t know when our travels will stop.  We do know that we will never return to our “Normal Life”.  We have seen and experienced too much so far.  No more will we put off a trip or a chance for an experience.  Life is too short, with no guarantees.  You never know when you will run out of health or time, and there may not be a later.  Life should be experienced and enjoyed, not something you are just marking time as you pass through.  I have seen and admired people with the strength to pursue this path, but was never able to push through my own doubts enough to break free myself.  Of course we still need to earn money and support our family, but there are many other options than the way I had been doing it, trading time for money.  I never want to look back with regret and see that I didn’t spend enough time with the people who are important to me.  So we continue to learn and charge ahead, and help each other along the way.